Personal Post
June/05/2007 08:36 Filed in: Life
Well, things are pretty crappy right now, to be
completely honest. My PopPop had a stroke about 2
weeks ago and he's been deteriorating since then. At
first we had some hope that he would recover, but I
think, no, I know that he's given up. He'll be with
my Nanny soon, who passed away just over a year ago.
He is still *in* his body, looking, squeezing our
hands, trying to talk,half smiling at us. We went up
yesterday and I told him that I love him and I told
him a few of the memories that I have with him that
mean a lot to me. It was seriously a difficult thing
for me to put into words, but I'm glad I did it. I
felt bad crying in front of him, I know he must hate
that, but it's unavoidable. It's awful to watch a
loved one like that, it's just terrible. I'm trying
to think of the bright side, that when he passes,
he'll be reunited with my Nanny, his wife of 65
years, and his parents, siblings, aunts and uncles,
all the family and friends that have already passed.
It's helping, but, it's not overwhelming the fact
that he's going to be so dearly missed by everyone
he's leaving behind. We've been compiling photo's,
scanning them in and restoring them. I'm going to put
together a slideshow of photo's, with some video
clips for every one in the family, we'll play it at
the funeral too, it should be really nice. It's sad
to make it, but I'm enjoying memorializing him like
this. My "real" grandfather wasn't much of a....well,
lets just say Pop Pop was more my grandfather, even
though he was technically a Great Grandfather. He was
a great man. I told him I loved him, and I told him
how much fun I had with him growing up, and the
things that I used to really look forward to when I
was little, and the memories that I'll cherish well
into my own old years. It was hard to say, because
goodbye's are always hard. I knew it was a goodbye,
he knows it's goodbye, but I never actually said
"goodbye" I just said "see ya later" when we left.
It's heartbreaking though.
Here's Pop Pop with my son, Neil his only Great Great Grandchild- this was right after Christmas of 2007.
In the meantime, I'm having issues with Etsy. Someone took offense to something I wrote and proceeded to hate-convo me as well as post negative things about me personally and professionally in the forums. I reported it to Admin, and - they banned BOTH of us from the forums for 3 days. Fine, ya know, I guess I broke the rules but she broke WAY more rules, so, why do we have the same punishment? Seems really unfair. I think I'll be avoiding the forums from here on out, or, at least for a while. I feel really betrayed. I was already down, because of all this PopPop stuff, and in the mist of it all this crap happens, well, ya know I just don't like it, and I don't need the extra stress. Etsy forums, up until now, has been a place for me to chat, offer advice, promote, help other users with various issues - goof off and have fun discussions. Well, I feel really betrayed now. She said outright mean and hurtful things - in public forum as well as in non stop convo's, and yet - we have the same punishment. I'm very emotional, and I know that I'm taking this personally, but ya know, it feels pretty personal. The things this girl said - didn't bother me, that's one person's opinion, but - Etsy admin's ruling on it is what's making me upset. I can't help but take it personally. So, whatever, I guess this girl wins. All it's doing is motivating me to get my zencart working, and leave Etsy. I never thought I'd think of leaving Etsy because I've liked it so much for the last year plus that I've been with them - but, it's kinda like the trust is gone now, so, the magic is lost.
In other news, I joined a gym with my best bud Crissy. We went together a few times, with PopPop being sick my schedule's been whacky so I've been going at odd hours, but the important thing is I'm going. I'm starting to really like it. I went today, after a really hard couple of days personally, and I just blasted my iPod and zoned out. I worked, and sweat, but I didn't want to leave. An hour and a half later I left, feeling a bit better. Tomorrow I meet with the trainer and hopefully she'll set up a work out routine, so I'm not just winging it anymore. One thing I've confirmed, I have really strong legs. Like, really strong - think Sayid in the season finale of Lost, snapping that guy's neck with just his legs - kind of strong. Funny. Don't mess with me, I might snap your neck with my legs of STEEL heh.
Ok, well, I'll go now. This is a really personal post, I've kinda steered away from personal post's in this blog for a while, cause, well, it's just soooo out there, but ya know, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Anyone who knows me, knows that. Anyone who knows me has heard me scream, cry, laugh, accost strangers - so - you all might as well too. Why not, right? I got nothing to hide.
Abbie
Here's Pop Pop with my son, Neil his only Great Great Grandchild- this was right after Christmas of 2007.
In the meantime, I'm having issues with Etsy. Someone took offense to something I wrote and proceeded to hate-convo me as well as post negative things about me personally and professionally in the forums. I reported it to Admin, and - they banned BOTH of us from the forums for 3 days. Fine, ya know, I guess I broke the rules but she broke WAY more rules, so, why do we have the same punishment? Seems really unfair. I think I'll be avoiding the forums from here on out, or, at least for a while. I feel really betrayed. I was already down, because of all this PopPop stuff, and in the mist of it all this crap happens, well, ya know I just don't like it, and I don't need the extra stress. Etsy forums, up until now, has been a place for me to chat, offer advice, promote, help other users with various issues - goof off and have fun discussions. Well, I feel really betrayed now. She said outright mean and hurtful things - in public forum as well as in non stop convo's, and yet - we have the same punishment. I'm very emotional, and I know that I'm taking this personally, but ya know, it feels pretty personal. The things this girl said - didn't bother me, that's one person's opinion, but - Etsy admin's ruling on it is what's making me upset. I can't help but take it personally. So, whatever, I guess this girl wins. All it's doing is motivating me to get my zencart working, and leave Etsy. I never thought I'd think of leaving Etsy because I've liked it so much for the last year plus that I've been with them - but, it's kinda like the trust is gone now, so, the magic is lost.
In other news, I joined a gym with my best bud Crissy. We went together a few times, with PopPop being sick my schedule's been whacky so I've been going at odd hours, but the important thing is I'm going. I'm starting to really like it. I went today, after a really hard couple of days personally, and I just blasted my iPod and zoned out. I worked, and sweat, but I didn't want to leave. An hour and a half later I left, feeling a bit better. Tomorrow I meet with the trainer and hopefully she'll set up a work out routine, so I'm not just winging it anymore. One thing I've confirmed, I have really strong legs. Like, really strong - think Sayid in the season finale of Lost, snapping that guy's neck with just his legs - kind of strong. Funny. Don't mess with me, I might snap your neck with my legs of STEEL heh.
Ok, well, I'll go now. This is a really personal post, I've kinda steered away from personal post's in this blog for a while, cause, well, it's just soooo out there, but ya know, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Anyone who knows me, knows that. Anyone who knows me has heard me scream, cry, laugh, accost strangers - so - you all might as well too. Why not, right? I got nothing to hide.
Abbie
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